{"id":3272,"date":"2017-07-31T11:01:58","date_gmt":"2017-07-31T18:01:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/?p=3272"},"modified":"2018-07-25T14:39:29","modified_gmt":"2018-07-25T21:39:29","slug":"7-ways-writing-can-be-therapeutic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/2017\/writing\/7-ways-writing-can-be-therapeutic\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Ways Writing Can Be Therapeutic"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"therapeutic\"

\u00a9 Diana Stevan – My Writing Desk<\/p><\/div>\n

After being away in New York, I am slowly getting back into my writing mode.<\/p>\n

Writing revives me. If I don’t write, I feel as though something is missing. Writing is also very therapeutic.<\/p>\n

Over the years, I have filled many journals with my private thoughts and feelings. One of these days I’ll have to go back and see what I wrote.<\/p>\n

I thought I would re-publish a post \u00a0(now slightly edited) that I did on \u00a0C. S. Laikin’s LIVE, WRITE, THRIVE.<\/span><\/p>\n

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My Background<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

I discovered how therapeutic writing can be during my twenty-five years as a family therapist. During that time, I guided individuals, couples, and families and helped them deal with the pain that brought them into my office. I\u2019ve seen my share of personal problems: mental illness, addictions, post-traumatic stress, domestic and sexual abuse, family and marital breakdown. I know that being normal means carrying both good and ugly feelings inside.<\/p>\n

We humans have a lot to contend with during our life\u2019s journey. Each one is unique. And sometimes there\u2019s nowhere to turn and no one to hear our story. And that\u2019s where writing comes in.<\/span><\/p>\n

Writing can be therapeutic when strong emotions trouble our mind. We can\u2019t sleep, we can\u2019t think straight, and we can\u2019t get on with the joys of life.<\/p>\n

Here are 7 ways writing can be therapeutic:<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. Straight Thinking<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

When you\u2019ve been assaulted by someone\u2019s words or deeds, writing down your feelings is a form of stepping back. Getting some emotional distance.<\/p>\n

\"therapeutic\"

\u00a9 Diana Stevan – My Journals<\/p><\/div>\n

By writing down your overwhelming feelings, those hurtful thoughts, the fear, the anger, the words that can get you into further trouble if spoken out loud, you can think more clearly about the steps you need to take.<\/p>\n

Writing down feelings and experiences can do much to alleviate the pain. Not that writing is a substitute for therapy but it\u2019s one way of getting the \u201cgarbage\u201d out. It\u2019s not unlike keeping a diary or a journal.<\/p>\n

2. Sleeping Better<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

Going to sleep with troubles on your mind is certain to give you a restless night. Keeping a notepad by your bed gives you the opportunity to write down whatever is troubling you\u2014before you fall asleep or even if you wake up in the middle of the night\u2014so you can address it in the morning.<\/p>\n

In this way, while you sleep, you\u2019re keeping your worries off your mind. At least for a few hours. Sweet dreams!<\/p>\n

3. Making Sense of Dreams<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

Have you woken up wondering why you dreamt what you dreamt? Whether it\u2019s a nice but confusing dream or a nightmare?<\/p>\n

By writing it down, you can begin to put the pieces together. Often what we dream is what is most pressing to us. By writing it down, we bring our unconscious to the surface. I love that about dreams; it\u2019s another resource in life\u2019s toolbox.<\/p>\n

4. Dealing with Unfinished Business<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

How often have people left our lives\u2014through death, dementia, or divorce or any other way\u2014and we find we\u2019re frustrated and sad because we didn\u2019t get the chance to let them know how we felt when they were with us?<\/p>\n

Writing a letter to your departed mother, father, child, or anyone else who was important to you is a way of discharging those frustrating feelings. Writing down what you couldn\u2019t say when they were with you soothes the heart and softens the hurt.<\/p>\n

I remember when my dad passed away. I wasn\u2019t there when he died, and I needed to write him and apologize. It wasn\u2019t the same as being there, but it did give me some relief.<\/p>\n

5. Minimizing Conflict with Difficult People<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

As we go through life, we can encounter difficult people from time to time. They might be members of our own families or just acquaintances\u2014these people who don\u2019t listen or for whatever reason can\u2019t hear what we\u2019re saying. It can be infuriating, especially when they are people we love, people who bring us joy but also incredible pain by their actions and words.<\/p>\n

Rather than confront them directly, which can lead to escalating arguments and possibly outright rejection, it helps to step back.<\/p>\n

You can\u2019t talk to anyone who is emotionally upset\u2014so worked up that all they want to do is get their point across. Sometimes it\u2019s better not to add fuel to the fire by arguing. Better to leave before the problem gets worse and write down afterward what you wanted to say but knew in your heart you couldn\u2019t deliver.<\/p>\n

Writing allows you to express yourself on paper and avoid a confrontation that doesn\u2019t serve anyone, least of all yourself. It can prevent the situation from festering like an untended wound.<\/p>\n

6. Healing Old Wounds<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

I find writing fiction very therapeutic; it can heal old wounds. There\u2019s something about letting out your thoughts and feelings on the page and giving them to your characters, especially ones that are troubling.<\/p>\n

Say you\u2019ve had a difficult experience, and it\u2019s still sitting in your craw. You can write it into a story or a poem or a song and discharge it that way.<\/p>\n

\"therapeutic\"<\/a>I found writing my last novel, THE RUBBER FENCE<\/strong><\/a>, cathartic. It was inspired by a work experience I had on a psychiatric ward. It was a challenging job that didn\u2019t go as I expected, and I met with considerable opposition.<\/p>\n

I left after nine months, but the system I worked in and the feelings I had stayed with me. I got rid of those troubling thoughts by giving them to my protagonist, a psychiatric intern. Though I wrote a fictional story, writing it was like wiping my hands off the hurt and disappointment that was weighing me down.<\/p>\n

So, joy of joys, I used what I learned from that tough time and wrote a book and a screenplay, and at the same time got some relief.<\/p>\n

7. Paving the Way to Better Relationships<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

All of us have had those times when a relationship has soured. And it\u2019s not because either you or the other party are difficult by nature. It\u2019s just life. Misunderstandings crop up.<\/p>\n

Writing can help you prepare what you want to say to improve the relationship, whether it\u2019s with someone at home or at work or elsewhere. Sometimes in arguments, what is hoped for gets lost. It gets lost because one or both of the parties involved is too busy blaming and not listening.<\/p>\n

If you can write your feelings down, and then edit them so that you can express what you want to without blame, you\u2019ll have a greater chance of being heard.<\/p>\n

Rehearsing those written words, keeping to the script, can help you deliver a coherent story.<\/p>\n

How about you? Do you find writing therapeutic? In what ways?<\/strong><\/h4>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

After being away in New York, I am slowly getting back into my writing mode. Writing revives me. If I don’t write, I feel as though something is missing. Writing… <\/p>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[4,86],"tags":[78,812,909,963,67,5],"class_list":["post-3272","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-writing","category-therapy-2","tag-diana-stevan","tag-the-rubber-fence","tag-therapeutic","tag-therapist","tag-therapy","tag-writing-2"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1LuVB-QM","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2902,"url":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/2016\/uncategorized\/cover-reveal\/","url_meta":{"origin":3272,"position":0},"title":"Cover Reveal for ALONG CAME A GARDENER","author":"Diana Stevan","date":"14 \u0416\u043e\u0432\u0442\u043d\u044f, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Cover Reveal Thrilled to reveal the cover for my next book, ALONG CAME A GARDENER. 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Internationally renowned installation artists had set up their work for the public's enjoyment and study.\u2026","rel":"","context":"\u0423 "Art"","block_context":{"text":"Art","link":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/category\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"installation art","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.dianastevan.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/FullSizeRender_10_1-300x188.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3272","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3272"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3272\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3272"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3272"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dianastevan.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3272"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}